My Jared Gelman Top 5 Countdown

When I think of Jared Gelman the first word that springs to mind is FIERCE! From his music, fashion sense and overall presentation Jared Gelman presents the image of a strong openly Queer Man who gives zero f*cks and I LOVE that! Jared Gelman's music makes me feel like unleashing my inner diva and owning the dance floor!

As I said before, 2018 was my watershed year in terms of discovering Queer Pop but 2019 was the year Queer pop completely took over my taste and Jared Gelman was one of the reasons why. I didn't know who he was going into 2019 but by the time the year wrapped I became one of his biggest Stans.

I came across Jared on Twitter where I saw a few other Queer Pop stars I was following talking about him. So I checked out his latest single at that time which was Return to Sender and I loved it as soon it got to the first chorus. Return to Sender was a BOP in all caps and it went straight into heavy rotation for me from that point forward.

As I followed Jared on social media and saw his performances it was clear he is a born dancer. More than most of his peers, Jared Gelman is all about tight but flashy choreography. If you miss the days of the pop girls like Madonna, Janet, Paula, Britney and even Christina who had heavily choreographed music videos and tours, then Jared Gelman is the pop star for you.

Jared has been hard at work these past few months and he says a lot of music is coming shortly. So before we are blessed with new music from Jared let's do a countdown of his 5 songs released thus far.

5. Pop That

Pop That is a pretty straight ahead sex bop about moving on from your ex with a hot new man you want to show off to everyone. Jared seems to have been in a relationship where he inspired his man but his man never supported him back (Much like the new Elliot Jones single Groupie.) Jared sings:

"I used to be a muse but I’m not that amusing
And I took it to my heart, it's goddamnn confusing
But then you lit a fire, you lit my fuse and
Now I got a new fling who won’t be abusing me."

Jared Gelman songs are definitely MOODS and this one will connect with anyone who wants to show their ex that they are doing much better without them.

4. Proximity

This was Jared's 4th single and the one that followed up Return to Sender. I remember this one didn't click initially with me like Return to Sender did. That said, the longer I lived with the song the more I liked it. This is a very subtle low key bop that's all about mood and atmosphere, which is something I can get behind in all honesty. It just takes a little bit of patience. Lyrically the song deals with being around someone who gets you so hot and bothered that you wish that they would just make the first move so both of you can indulge in your lust for one another. It becomes clear very fast that Jared Gelman is very good at serving up sexually charged bops.

3. Never Know What It's Like

Jared's first single is very different from the four that came afterward. On Never Know What It's Like Jared tackles homophobia and how it can be suffocating at times. Jared starts the song by saying that just being your authentic self as a queer person can be a dangerous decision:

"Do you know what it's like to have to be scared
Every time that you want to go out?
Every time that you want to dress up?
Everytime

I agree
Isn't it the saddest thing
Isn't it something that you want to bring
Change to in the grand scheme of things
And I think it'll happen if you join me."

This is something all queer people have to grapple with almost EVERY SINGLE DAY! The fear of being attacked for being seen as queer and wondering if it's worth it day to day to express their true authentic selves. Later on Jared sings about how no matter what he is going to be his authentic self to the end no matter what the cost:

"Walk in a room they turns heads
News says they want me dead
It's not in my head
And it needs to be said
They hate what they fear
My mission's so clear
I'm an enigma
Trapped by the stigma
I'll fight until I'm frozen or comatose
I'm gonna fight this dysmorphic episode
I'll fight it until I'm frozen or comatose

I'm gonna this dysmorphic episode."

This whole song also reminds me of something that Jared posted on social media last year. He was out at a bar/club and an older gay gentleman came up to him and told him to not act and dress so flamboyantly because it will be a a lot easier on him if he isn't so openly gay and extra. This broke my heart on 2 counts. First Jared should never have to hear that from someone, least of all someone from our own community. At the same time my heart breaks for the older gentleman too. It's clear that the older gentleman has suffered the slings and arrows of homophobia his entire life and he had to suppress parts of himself in order to survive. He is truly not living his authentic life, because he is trying to survive in a world not built for queer people and in his mind he's just trying to help other members of the community so they don't go through what he went through. It's not right but at the same time it shows once again how growing up queer in a straight man's world takes a toll on everyone who identifies as LGBTQ. Hopefully Queer artists like Jared can help break down those walls more and help the younger generation of queer kids feel more safe and empowered to express their queerness openly and loudly.

2. Check Your Files

Check Your Files is a bop that has attitude for dayz! This is Jared at his most confident while acknowledging an admirer from afar. I also love how he slips in these whisper lines in the background like when he sings "you're clearly in the way" and then he hear him say quietly in the background "move." It's such a diva moment and I love it because it makes me laugh every time. Then Jared tops it later when he sings "I'm the boss bitch" and then he reiterates that statement by whispering "Boss." Musically this is a BOP from top to bottom with a chorus that will run laps through your brain for a long time. I love the production on Jared Gelman songs because they are always densely layered with lots of interesting things going on in the background to keep your ears interested. Also I have to point out the end where Jared Gelman reminds you that this is a Jared Gelman joint. As if there was any doubt Jared!

1. Return to Sender

Return to Sender was one of the best pop songs of 2019 full stop. Every moment of Return to Sender is built to be a delivery system for as many hooks as possible. As soon as I heard this song I was a Jared Gelman Stan right then and there. Like Check Your Files this is another song dripping in attitude but here Jared is kicking his man to the curb for not giving him what he needs:

"Lately I’ve been through it
Hangin by a thread
In need of a friend
To be there for my shit

But when I get to talking
To get it off my chest
You’re not listening
And I start to wonder
Do you see yourself in my sad eyes, my sad eyes ohhhhhh
Cue the symphony here’s your opening
Are you getting off on my sad eyes, my sad eyes ohh
Are my tears just a mirror"

Jared feels like this is once again another one way relationship and he knows he can do better. The main chorus which uses returned mail as a metaphor for dumping a man has everything we love about choruses in pop music. It's fun, it's clever, it great to sing along to and it's just a little bit silly which I think is important for good pop music sometimes. Pop music is meant to be fun and a little silly at times. This is something Britney Spears and Katy Perry understood. Sometimes a little humor and a clever wink can go a long way to endearing you as a pop star and making your songs more likable in turn. This song certainly endeared Jared Gelman to me and over a year later this is a still a serve. Here's to more Jared Gelman bops in 2020!