A Portrait of Greyson Chance

Greyson Chance has been in the public eye for over a decade now. His performance of Lady Gaga's Paparazzi in a grade school talent show went viral on YouTube where it gained over 65 million views in 2010. This video caught the attention of Ellen who had him on the show, which raised his profile even further. Soon came singles, albums and more and yet I had no idea Greyson Chance existed until last year!

You see even though I went on YouTube a lot it was usually to watch music videos, a lot of time from older acts, or to look up movie and TV show clips. I didn't follow YouTube personalities or influencers and I barely paid attention to pop radio outside a massively successful pop diva here and there. Instead, during most of the 2010s I was still deeply entrenched in Alternative Rock radio and all things Batman, so Greyson Chance was nowhere close to my radar back then.

That all changed in March of 2019 when Billboard Pride announced that Greyson Chance was their artist of the month. By this point I was now becoming fully entrenched in all things Queer Pop and I was following Billboard Pride closely as a result. 2 months before their artist of the Month had been Cub Sport, another act I had never heard of, but I soon became infatuated with and so it was with Greyson Chance. I didn't know of his past quite yet, but if he was good enough to be Billboard Pride's artist of the month then he had my attention.

What caught me more was hearing his song Yours on a few playlists around the same time. I heard it a few times not actually registering who it was at first, but knowing that I liked it. Once I saw it was Greyson, then I was all in. From that point forward I looked up his music videos, interviews and his appearances on Ellen, old and new.

A few things struck me when I watch his first interview with Ellen and his most most recent interview with Ellen. First thing that struck me is I'M OLD! In the 2011 interview Greyson Chance is still a kid and in the 2019 interview he is now a man! 2011 still seems like it just happened in my mind, but seeing these 2 interviews juxtaposed really made me realize how long ago that was! In the 2011 interview Greyson is given advice to watch out for the girls and knowing what we know now I find that moment cute.

The biggest thing I took away from the 2019 interview though was how eloquent Greyson Chance spoke. He reminded me of Troye Sivan in that they both seemed wise beyond their years despite being in their early 20s. Like Troye Sivan, Greyson had grown up in the spotlight as well as on social media & YouTube. It was clear to me that they both had already learned a lot of hard lessons. They had also had grappled with not only their homosexuality, but who they were as people. Greyson projected this calm confidence in his 2019 Ellen interview that drew me to him even further. As I have mentioned many times before on this blog I grew up with no queer role models and as a result I suppressed parts of myself to be more accepted by the straight people around me. So seeing these young gay pop stars not only talk openly and honestly about their Queerness, but find strength and confidence in it really hits home for me. Most of these queer pop stars may be younger than me, but I look up to them because they are teaching me how to be more confident as a gay man and how to let go of my internalized shame.

I of course listened to his 2019 album Portraits and I loved it. I had listened to some of his earlier music too and it was clear this new album represented a clean break from most of what came before. Greyson was not only expressing himself freely now as a gay man, but musically his style had changed drastically. Whereas his earlier records were more broadway pop and his singles and EPs later were much more EMD dance pop, Portraits was much more mid tempo RnB and Greyson's vocals had also become a lot smoother and more soulful at the same time. Portraits truly captured an artist redefining themselves and coming into their own in the best way possible. Throughout the album Greyson looks to his past in order to learn from it and become a better man as a result, which is a pretty inspiring theme to tackle on a pop album if you ask me. The message of Portraits is that no one is perfect, but we should all strive to be better and to do better and I can behind that 100%.

So by this point it was clear that I was going to see Greyson Chance live when he came to DC because it was now my mission to go to every Queer Pop show that came through DC. I got tickets to see Greyson the first weekend of November at the Rock and Roll Hotel. For this show both my husband and my good friend Will were attending. Also God bless my husband because he is not as into going to concerts as I am and he accompanied me to Greyson Chance that weekend, Todrick Hall the following weekend and my 3rd time seeing Myylo in between those 2 shows!

We waited in line for a while before Will eventually joined us and as per usual I did a lot of people watching at this show. What I noticed is that there were a lot of teen girls accompanied by their moms to see Greyson. Davy Boi once told me that in order to be a successful pop star you really have to get the women to love you and it was clear the girls and their moms loved Greyson. It once again confirmed my theory that gay pop stars never had to be afraid of the girls rejecting them because of their sexuality. In fact, there was a meet and greet for fans ahead of the show and during the concert Greyson mentioned a girl and her mother who had met him during the meet and greet who made an impression on him. He brought them on stage and took a selfie with them and then said very cutely that he was picking up the vibe that the mom liked him even more than her daughter did.

Now I had been to the Rock N Roll Hotel once before for a back to the 90s night that was cover bands of Nirvana and Stone Temple Pilots. It was a fun night but my head was wrecked afterward. Now I went to this back to the 90s night after my first concussion but that had healed for the most part and I had not relapsed again. Yet, for 2 days my whole nervous system felt out of wack! I just felt really awful after that show so I was a little nervous for the Greyson show but I wasn't gonna cancel either. So with my blue light glasses and ear plugs in hand we all stood towards the back of the club. Greyson came on with no opener right after 8pm and was done by 9:30 which I was all for since it was a work night!

At first it was a little loud when Greyson took the stage. I remembered how this was not only a small club, but that there were speakers across the low ceiling and they were causing the whole club to shake. Luckily shortly thereafter it settled down. It was really only Greyson on stage with a guitar player. Sometimes Greyson would play the piano and sometimes he wouldn't and it was a very intimate show as a result. On top of the Mother and Daughter he brought on stage, Greyson really endeared himself to the audience that night. He came out wearing a Nationals jersey since they had just won World Series. Then he endeared himself more to me when he said something to the effect of "I''m no expert in baseball, I'm trying to learn real quick. It's the one where cute boys hold bats right?"

Overall it was a very fun night and Greyson did a great job. Greyson also premiered his first post Portraits single that night with Boots, which is a total bop and it was a definite highlight of the concert. Both Will and my husband loved the song as well. It showed that while Portraits had become a defining era for Greyson he was already looking towards the future and not resting on his laurels. Based on what we have heard thus far, it sounds like Greyson is dipping slowly back into EDM dance pop but with a stronger RnB flavor that is carrying over from Portraits.

I am on pins & needles waiting for the next Greyson Chance album. I feel Greyson can only go up from here and has the potential to truly be a break out pop star like Troye Sivan or Years & Years if he plays his cards right. The audience is there, the talent is there and I think he could really bring more queerness to the mainstream which I'm all about. Still none of this would have been possible before Portraits. Yes Greyson had success before, but he needed an album to not only shown he had grown up, but that he was a pop star with a vision who could deliver something fresh and different. Portraits achieved that with flying colors making 2019 the best year Greyson had ever experienced as an artist. Therefore let's take a look back at this wonderful album as I count down my top 5 songs off of it. This is just a starter guide because honestly the whole album is worthy of being heard from start to finish.

5. White Roses

The final single off Portraits is a lovely tune about two people who love each other, but can't be fully together because one of them isn't ready to give up their other life yet. Reading between the lines this clearly is about a man in love with another man, but he can't fully admit it yet because he's too afraid to come out. Greyson sings from the point of view of the person afraid to commit fully to this new relationship when he sings:

" Same places on a Friday night
Holding glances but we're tongue tied
I'm with my friends, and it's hard to smile
It's crazy how that feels, I haven't slept in a while

I never saw it coming
I thought we had it all
I feel you in those moments
Those nights, held in your arms

Darling be careful with me
'Cause there's part of me that you don't know
Darling be gentle with me
When you tell me that you need to go
And if you should miss me, don't call me, don't tell me, just leave me alone
Because you cut me wide open left teardrops on all my white roses."

The music video flips this narrative a bit where Greyson is the narrator to another boy who is struggling to come out of the closet and to tell his girlfriend he is gay. It's a touching and emotionally charged music video that shows how lying to yourself not only hurts those around you, but it takes huge toll on your own well being as well. This is something I think every single Queer person has struggled with and yet it's something that goes unseen and undetected by the mainstream culture at large. A lot of our own friends and family don't fully grasp the struggle and pain we as Queer people go through in and even out of the closet because we are good at hiding it. Music videos and songs like White Roses are important because it helps shed light on something that has gone unnoticed in pop music and even the greater culture at large. Again I needed music videos like White Roses growing up in the closet, but there was nothing like it back then. I take comfort in knowing now that at least we have music videos and songs like White Roses so the younger generation of queer kids have something to look up to.

4. Black on Black

Black on Black was the song everyone wanted to be released as a single but it never was. This was easily the sexiest song off of Portraits. Black on Black oozes coolness right from the start and sees Greyson getting a little frisky with another man:

"Let's stay here for a while

You'll snap some Polaroids 'cause boy that's your style
You'll tell me that you want to see little more
We end up back down on the floor (hey)

I'm on some 90's shit, lime and a vodka kick
Just like I'm cool enough for you (feel like I'm cool enough for you)

I love the way you wear that black on black
Oh I love the way you talk to me like that
With your fingers on my chest, it's heart attack
Oh I love the way you wear that black on black
Take it off like that, like that."

Why this was never released as a single I'm not sure, though maybe it's because it's the most sexually explicit and homoerotic song on the album, which is sad think but could be true. Either way Black on Black is already a fan favorite and I'm sure it's gonna continue to be a fan favorite for a long time.

3. Shut Up

As the first single off of Portraits, Shut Up reintroduced Greyson Chance to pop music. Gone are the broadway style piano pieces and EDM Dance tracks he was previously known for. Instead we get a mid tempo RnB love song that felt sexier and more confident than anything Greyson had released up till this point. It's also clear how much Greyson has grown as a songwriter at this point too as his eye for detail throughout the song leaves a lasting impression:

"You dress in all black, the middle of the summer

You're smoother than you think, you rock that Alex Turner
Your style, your arms, wrapped in leather, makes me want you forever (oh, oh)
But I cannot break this habit, pure anxiety
Stuck here searching for some words that you might need
Maybe you don't need them, it's not what we're about
And maybe I'll just slow it down, down, down, down, down

I cannot hold my tongue, you give me much to say
I'm sweating bullets, nervous that you'll push away
And when your eyes catch mine, I know I talk too much
So give me your two lips and baby, I'll shut up"

Shut Up announced that Greyson was no longer the boy who did a cover of Lady Gaga's Paparazzi. Instead we are now presented with Greyson Chance the young man who is ready to explore his sexuality and place in the world. This new and improved Greyson Chance was here to stay and he was about to pick up a lot more fans in the process including yours truly.

2. West Texas

When I listened to Portraits for the first time this was a clear highlight. What helped it stand out was actually the interlude track called Plains where Greyson explains where the inspiration for this song came from. Interlude tracks can sometimes come off as tedious filler but this is a rare case where the interlude track actually enhances your experience of the song that follows, at least for me anyway. In the interlude Greyson talks about one of his earliest performances when he was still a kid and he dedicated the song to all the people who have ever F***ed him over.

After the performance Greyson says his mom pulled him aside and told him that boys use that kind of language but not men and she was raising him to be a man. This moment left a deep impression on Greyson. We then launch into the song proper, which is an homage to his mother and the lessons she taught him over the years. Once again Greyson's eye for detail is on point. As a listener you can imagine the backdrop to every lyric Greyson sings:

"I can see that house in the summer, baseball in the yard

And when my knees got bloody, you told me keep playing hard
I remember mass on Sundays, collared up to the ten
You were so damn faithful, even if it all was a mess
And in those years that we weren't speaking, when I was drinking for some meaning
You called me on the phone and then you said

Boy get the message
This ain't no New York City
Born and bred in West Texas
Raised you to be different
No matter how it ends, no matter all your sin
I hope you will understand
When I leave, you better be a good man"

Later on Greyson wonders how he will go on living after his mom finally leaves this mortal coil and he realizes that the best way to keep her in his heart is to live by the moral compass she gave him growing up:

"And it's so hard to imagine what I'll do without you here

As you gaze your eyes towards mine tell me to wipe away those tears
You say Jesus loves you, always will no matter what you did
And in that moment, I'm a kid again."

Here we see the heart of the Portraits album where Greyson looks back to his childhood in order to live his life as a better man. West Texas and the album as a whole is about how the loved ones in your life truly shape who you become as you grow up and the best way to honor those people is to live by the morals and values they instilled within you. When I saw Greyson Chance live he opened with this song, which was very fitting because West Texas spells out the mission statement of Portraits perfectly. For me personally this is arguably the most emotionally moving song on the entire album.

1. Yours

Greyson Chance entered my radar thanks to Billboard Pride, but it was hearing this song come up on multiple different playlists on Spotify that really won me over. The production reminds me a bit of early 90s RnB and Pop but in a very laid back manner. Here Greyson sings about a lover who is either no longer in his life or lives far away.

"All these towns between us, they mean nothing, I'll be back to you one day, one day

And all these roads between us, they mean nothing, oh I promise we're okay, we're okay

Seeing the 2 AM calls, oh it's my nature
I'm a little bit high calling to tell you
I'm yours, I'm yours
Remember that night out in my car
When I told you there wouldn't be no scars
Still yours, still yours

No matter who I'm with, it's you that I adore
If you're not sure, baby I'm yours
Given the way you make me feel, I want you more
If you're not sure, baby I'm yours"

This is one of the most effortless pop songs I've ever heard. It just feels so perfect every time it comes on. I never get tired of Yours and it was easily in my top 5 songs of 2019. It's the song that cemented my Greyson Chance fandom and if you give it chance it could turn you into a Greyson Chance fan as well.